Family

The more time I spend away from them, the more I love my family. I have a great relationship with both of my parents. If you told me that would happen ten years ago, I'd have laughed. But even in the last year, it's amazing how many things have changed. The holidays have a way of making me emotional.. for me, at least.

Today, my dad took my dog to visit my brother's grave. He died 23 years ago, the day after Christmas. I am sure he still goes on his birthday every year, too. My dad is sentimental, and remembers. But in his own way. My mom, too. I get it from somewhere. Sometimes I think of all my parents have been through.. as an adult, I realize how difficult it must have been sometimes. In the end, I am thankful that we learned what we did as children. I can't change it, anywhow.

It sounds ridiculous, but watching my family with my dog has been quite the experience. It's brought of the softer side from both of my parents, but especially with my dad. He holds him like a baby, he falls asleep with Sparky next to him on the couch, he makes sure he has his own meal (yes, this has been a source of annoyance at times). I caught him once, army-crawl style on the floor, playing with my little ball of black fur. I have so many moments where I am caught thinking - who are my parents?? I was raised with a pretty no-bullshit approach. My mom the other day knocked on my door, and I opened it. She was carrying Sparky. She said she was going to make dinner. Apparently I was supposed to take over Sparky-watch, and apparently he could not walk on the floor. I laughed. Maybe they've softened in their old(er) age.

Brigitte and I more or less grew up together but Hanna grew up while I was gone. Sometimes it seems like one day I left, and I came back and she was driving, staying out until 1am, and studying for the SATs. Sometimes I feel like the outsider. At this point, I'm the only one out of state as Brigitte moved back to South Florida, with her fiance, Mike.

It's interesting to see how life has changed us all. Weathered us in some ways, inspired us in others. My mom recently took on an entirely new career path and got her third masters degree. My sister just got her first "office job". I'm proud of all of us - we've been through a lot, just as any family has. There are things that will annoy me forever, there are things I am eternally grateful for.

I love my family, and am grateful to be able to spend the time I have with them.